Condoms. We’ve all fucked/been fucked with them.
When I started this ad blogging baloney in 2005, one of the things that caught my attention was how many condom ads popped up monthly, worldwide: A Fucking Fuck-Ton. And so I decided, stupidly, to try to “review” every single one of them.
Most of them are bad/stupid/inexplicable. Many of them are fake, created to win awards, or just for shits and giggles. No matter, these are 12 of the best condom ads in fucking condom ad history.
1. Condomania (Japan)
There is no digital trickery here. These are creations of Photographer Hal. “I have applied the use of the vacuum sealed package, used to store futon covers in everyday life…I found that the couple can be sealed in, with the appearance of being freshly wrapped…I have called this event ‘Fresh Love.’"
Then, as Adland noted, O&M Japan just wrote an appropriate headline and slapped a Condomania logo on Hal’s images. Hey, it works very well. All the best creatives steal. See the third here on Adland.
2. Four Seasons condoms (Australia)
“Banned” commercial written and directed by Gary Eck—You can only watch it on YouTube, no nudity. Four Seasons wanted to highlight that they offer several sizes of condoms. So: Eck shot a couple trying out the rubbers by “fucking” in several positions right in the drug store (below). Not one of my favorites, but it’s got 10 million+ views, so it probably worked.
3. Tulipan condoms (Argentina)
A smartly subtle campaign by Y&R Buenos Aires. Happiness…is other people’s children—like your brother’s or sister’s. This “anti-life” message would never fly in America, Land Of The Free Unless You’re A Pregnant Woman.
4. Cupid condoms (India)
EVERYTHING 100% OFF! Here we have the same “prevents unwanted children” benefit. The art direction—purposely creating an ugly starburst-filled newspaper style “sale” layout—makes this ad a winner. Savings of a lifetime, indeed. Ad agency: Publicis, Mumbai.
5. Preventor Super-Duper Condoms (Belgium)
“Increase the volume of your love”. A cheap joke, yes. But an effective, fun cheap joke. Ad agency: JWT, Brussels.
6. Condoms—PSA (Brazil)
“Some people should never have been born”. You just gotta love the craft of this spec creation by the art directors of São Paulo ad agency Platinum FMD. Beautiful. See a second Kim Jong-un ad, and also the digital process behind the ads, here.
7. 7-Eleven condoms: “Land of Chlamydia” (Norway)
On-screen copy:
“Norway has one of the highest rates of Chlamydia in Europe. Visiting from abroad? Protect yourself from the locals!”
Norway: the Kingdom of Dangerous Love! Ad agency: Morgenstern, Norway.
8. Olla prolong condoms (Brazil)
(Note: I first featured this ad in this post about great ad illustrations.) Olla prolong condoms “with climax delay”. This is hilarious. Patient Spermatozoa hanging in the testes, whiling the time away, waiting for their man and his numbed knob to reach the eventual point of no return. There are sperms playing chess. Playing a guitar. In a sleeping bag. Sleeping in a hammock (LOL). Playing computer solitaire. Ad agency: Age. Comunicações, São Paulo.
9. Sagami Condoms (Japan)
This is a fantastic concept. The spot is for Sagami .002, the world's thinnest condom (at the time). As the two lovers (the man from Fukuoka, and the woman from Tokyo) run to meet each other, the distance between them is documented on-screen, in millimeters. Thus, the product benefit is permanently planted in your brain. The commercial won a Gold Lion at Cannes. Ad agency: GT, Tokyo. (Note: here’s a visually interesting German ad for ultra thin Condomi condoms.)
10 Adam extra long condoms (India)
Look at these fucking (literally) illustrations for Adam XL condoms. The extra-long-distance copulating is funny. But check out the bizarre details: The frog wearing one sneak looking for his micro-penis with a magnifying glass (below); the mouse doggy stylin' a drunk cat (above); ants lassoing a chicken-football wearing one Converse sneak (above). Agency: Publicis, India.
11. Safer Sex For Seniors, “Kamasutra” (Florida, USA)
Another “use a condom” PSA, this one targeting us geezers. See clothed olds fake get it on in several positions. Wondered how many muscles were pulled (heh) during this shoot. Ad agency: DDB, NYC.
12. Durex “Balloon Animals” (USA)
Lastly, and bestly, it is the most glorious condom ad ever created, featuring boinking bunnies made of condom balloons. A simple, brilliant, hilarious idea. The SFX. The ass-sniffing. The bunny train. The exhausted bunnies. Slow Clap. Ad Agency: Fitzgerald+Co, Atlanta. Here’s a version with a few “bloopers”.
13. Durex chocolate-flavored condoms (Belgium)
OK, this ad doesn’t make a lick sense for two reasons: 1—Miss Lewinsky reportedly blew Billy's willy willy-nilly; 2—like most flavored condoms, Durex's are sugar-free. Fyi: Humo is a Belgian humor magazine.
This is insanely glorious. Thank you. 🤣