Recent American Ads That Make Me As Angry As Jack Rebney
If you know about legendary Jack, you know that's VERY angry.
Jack Rebney, aka “Winnebago Man”, has been a hero of mine since I started this”angry” blogging charade. He was just a simple man trying to make a simple ad selling RVs. And he simply couldn’t take the process. (Watch this wonderful video of his cussing outtakes from the 1980s shoot.)
All three of the below commercials are from June.
Stella Artois (USA)
Having abandoned their classy yet sexist “She Is A Thing Of Beauty” campaign, an idea (Woman=Beer) Mother London obviously stole from Homer Simpson, Stella released a new spot last month that is stupid and annoying.
It’s titled ”It’s Time To Dine Again” (“Make Dining Great Again” was briefly considered). In it, we observe a a woman with a table full of work. Man walks up with two “chalices” of Stella Artois. Woman “flips” table, work disappears, food appears. Man flips table again, more food plus four friends appear. One friend starts texting, woman flips him (see below), phone replaced by beer. From the press release:
“With a simple flip, the table previously covered in work materials transforms into a beautiful dining experience, immersing the characters in the true meaning of The Life Artois”
“Immersing”. See: they’re literally “flipping the script”. Or something. The spot somehow has over three million views yet very predictably has only 42 Likes—probably all by Stella employees. Ad agency: None.
Samsonite (USA)
Any ad that features the painful cliché SEIZE EVERY DAY is gonna trigger me. Also, buried in the 300-word press release is “manifesto”, another trigger word and a guarantee that the ad is going to talk down to you like you’re a dolt. Fine, I’ll transcribe it so you don’t have to watch it (ALL CAPS, because that’s what they did onscreen):
“PAID TIME OFF (PTO) IS NOT A GIFT. AND IT SHOULDN’T BE AN AFTERTHOUGHT. IT’S YOURS FOR THE TAKING. SET YOUR STATUS TO DO NOT DISTURB AND LET YOUR OUT OF OFFICE (OOO) MESSAGE DO WHAT IT DOES BEST. LEAVE THE SCHEDULE BEHIND. UNPLUG AND RECONNECT. TURN NEW EXPERIENCES INTO LIFELONG MEMORIES (ugh). SEIZE EVERY DAY, EVERY LONG WEEKEND. THIS SUMMER, TAKE WHAT’S YOURS.”
So many flat words crammed into 30 seconds. And I feel no closer to buying any Samsonite luggage. Ad agency: Iris Worldwide.
White Claw “REFRSHR” (USA)
(leaving out vowels is so 20 years ago, White Claw) I have not yet consumed a “hard” seltzer. I don’t understand the product. I do like seltzer after exercise, though it gives me gas. Anyway, the spot is titled “Always Re”. Judging by the track (“Stunnin”, Curtis Waters) and the casting, I’m not cool enough for this product or this commercial.
Again, onscreen copy transcribed (again, ALL CAPS, because that’s BOLD AF):
THERE WILL ALWAYS BE THOSE WHO REINVENT. THOSE WHO REDEFINE. RECREATE. REEXPLORE (somebody looked up all their “re” words). REIMAGINE. REPOP. RESPLASH(?). REMIX. REDESIGN. RENEW. RETWIST. REMISCHIEF(??). RECITRUS (lost me). REFRESH. REIMAGINE (already said that). REEXPLORE (ditto). RECOOL. REPUCKER (what).
White Claw now OWNS all the RE words, real and made-up. So don’t even go there other “reinventing” brands.
RE-MIND me again when conceptually creative ads died. Ad agency: VCCP.
