Ladies & Gentlemen: We Have The First Nomination For 'Worst Ad Of The Year'
Why do ALL bottled water ads suck?
Dear Free Subscribers:
Starting Monday, January 16th, this Substack is going (mostly) behind a paywall. I’m sorry, I don’t want to do this. But this is my full-time job, my only income. And I’m not making nearly enough to even pay the rent. I will continue to write at least four articles a week in 2023. But you will only have access to one per week, which will NOT include my new weekly audio posts.
$50 is a fair price (or $5/month) for what I provide. I have created literally thousands of ads in my 30+ year career as a CLIO, One Show, etc. etc. award-winning copywriter. And I have been a pro ad critic, The Best Ad Critic In The World ™ (trademark pending), for almost 20 years. Nobody else provides this combination. Nobody does what I do better. PLUS, consider my very creative swearing.
I hope you join me on this cuss-filled 2023 journey. It’s gonna be a lot of fun. And you will learn a few things. Fuckers. Thank you.
(OK, technically, this ad came out last month, but it just showed up on AdsOfTheWorld.)
The copy (translated and [punctuated] by the ad agency from Georgian):
“It’s absolutely natural that you drink water (OH REALLY?), but what’s the strongest true thirst? (Hydration?) When you are thirsty for victory, When you are thirsty to make your people happy! When you are thirsty for going back to the childhood! When you are thirsty for adventures! When you are thirsty for get to know the universe! Drink Kobi when you are thirsty for life!
I AM thirty after watching this ad five fucking times: thirsty for writing that doesn’t suck the ass of an ass beast, and some non-stock video images. And why does the voiceover sound like a dumb AI Frenchman? Ad agency: CONTACT, Georgia (the country).
PREVIOUSLY: A Close Examination Of New Laughably Pretentious Bottled Water Ads.
I dunno this one might be so bad that it's good.