You're About To Hear One Of The Cringiest Lines In Commercial History
Glenlivet and their new "brand ambassador" Anna Paquin are REALLY desperate to sell whisky to people with vaginas.
Kiwi Paquin stars in a new “film” for the single malt whisky that very pointedly and bluntly targets women in the Austalian/New Zealand market. Subtle it ain’t. Or, “yeah-nah” as the Kiwis like to say.
The script starts with Paquin saying “Life’s too damn short to follow the rules…” and gets worse from there. Don’t blame her, she didn’t write it (at least I fucking hope not). No CW is listed in the credits.
OK, If you haven’t watched the ad, here’s the groaner of a line:
“WHISKY DOESN’T CARE WHAT’S BETWEEN YOUR LEGS”
It needs to be pointed out that men who suffer from “whiskey-dick” would certainly (shyly, awkwardly) have issue with this claim.
Right after Paquin says the line, we cut to a shot of this big cat wall art and we hear a big cat roar. In case you missed the connection, this wall cat is a metaphor for Paquin’s PUSSY.
Anyway, what else doesn’t whisky care about?
What’s between your ears
What’s between a rock and a hard place
What’s between Two Ferns
Alcoholism
Glenlivet
Whisky
Anna Paquin
Caring
ANYTHING
EVERYTHING.
Below, another piece of “art” from the commercial referencing the above edgy line that Glenlivet is very, very proud of.
The spot is hashtagged on YouTube with #BreakTheStereotype. Yeah, from my view the “stereotype” was broken years ago: Today’s “modern” woman already drinks fucking whisky. Glenlivet is trying to push the bullshit ad trick of creating tension where there is none. The spot was shot in the “1968 Hollywood Regency style house” of the ad’s director, Jamie Nelson. Ad agency: Emotive, Sydney Australia.
Paquin of course won an Oscar® at the age of 11 for bitching for two hours at men carrying her heavy-ass fucking piano all over creation. I do hope she was paid a shit-ton for this. She deserves it for her adult acting work.
Thank you for this. This woeful, insulting and just plain ugly ad made me so angry. I scoured the internet to find solace in others who also loathed it. Thank you. I feel better having found a kindred mind.
Yikes! So cringey it made me wish I had not watched it. I resisted turning it off in embarrassment two or three times.