Valuable Copywriting Lessons From 12-Year-Olds

Kids Write The Darndest Things.

(I’m taking a break this week from analyzing real, bad commercial copy because it makes me lose a little more hope every time I do it. But, I’ll be back at it next week.)

NOTE: Both of these ad assignment answers were emailed to me about 10 years ago. Since then, they’ve only gotten better with age. These two kids are just further proof that you don’t need an advanced degree, or really any degree (the great Ed McCabe didn’t go to college), to be an ad creative.

“Guido” Brand Toothpaste

This 6th-grade boy (he’s now a flourishing young man, hopefully) covers everything: Media, Branding, Packaging, and Creative.

“Teenagers love guidos because it’s “the new thing”. No guy is gonna get some sweet guidettes (sic) heart if he ain’t got 1. rockin’ hair, 2. hot bod, 3. The Freshest Breath In Da Jersey Shore.”

FIST PUMPIN’ LIKE A CHAMP™ should have been his slogan entry. And yes, the toothpaste tube design should have sunglasses and spiky hair on it.

Amazingly, and wrongly, it looks like his teacher gave him a fucking ZERO grade. That’s BULLSHIT. UPDATE: A commenter has pointed out that the grade is “minus-zero”, so a 100. Apologies to the readers and the teacher.

BRILLIANT.

Verizon Wireless Service

“When your schedule clears up, you take up taxidermy”—LOL

This was a 7th-grader’s entry for a local newspaper contest sponsored by Verizon. She/he had already learned the first, best lesson about Ad Creativity: borrow/usurp/steal other ideas whenever possible.

The very smart kid riffed off a very funny DIRECTV campaign (ad agency: Grey NYC) that was ubiquitous at the time. Below was my favorite spot:

FYI: Rats can and do spread plagues. So, bonus points for accuracy. I don’t know if he/she won the contest. ADD: It would make a great :30 radio spot.