The Most Painful Injury Lawyer Ads NYC Has Ever Seen.

And believe me, we've seen them all.

For many years, Celino & Barnes (above) were the most well-known NYC injury lawyers thanks to their ubiquitous TV ads that seemed to run every ten minutes on every local channel. We could sing their jingle, and we did. (It even inspired a play and an SNL sketch.) They were making $10 million a year each until they famously, viciously broke up. One month after that New York Magazine story, Barnes (the bald, and IMO, much cooler one) died in a small plane crash. Celino carries on with his own firm.

But there is now a new injury lawyer face plastered on billboards, in subway cars, and TV screens. He seemingly unironically thinks he is the coolest, “downest” thing the City has ever seen. He looks like a douchebag lawyer. And, judging by the horrible ads, is a douchebag lawyer.

Official portrait. Smirky Egotistical Fuck.

His name is Seth Harris, partner at Harris Keenan & Goldfarb. He is the ad face/voice of the firm. According to his bio page, he has wanted to be a lawyer since he was eight.

Here’s one of his “Moments with Seth Harris…” where he keeps repeating the firm’s number, and then a group behind him comes together to “spontaneously” dance. Notice his glance at the camera as he walks out of picture. Here, he envisions everyone in the City knowing and loving him, because he is “local”.

But then, you leave your apartment and walk into an A train car, and…

Left—Yo, My NIGGA, Yo. Right—Yo, Naughty By Nature, please sue this fuckface back to Mama (for mental injury).

Then, you come up from underground, and…he fancies himself a borough ambassador. Hey Seth, how bout you wander around Brownsville or Bed-Stuy at 3am. Wear your best watch. Ever rep yourself in injury court? “Hood”. Man he is down.

Caveat Emptor: This is apparently a Photoshopped version of the above billboard; But it is all over Google. I wrote the firm to ask if it was real. They haven’t written me back.

But: From what we’ve seen so far, I would not put wearing a durag past this idiot. FYI: YURRRRRRRRR means “Hello” in street slang.