SHIT, SHIT, SHIT. I love the word. Almost as much as FUCK. It’s one of the main reasons I love “Reservation Dogs”—everybody calls each other SHIT-ASSES.
OK…Which of these recent shitty ads is the shittiest?
1. Ellio’s
I thought brands learned this lesson 20 years ago. STAY the FUCK away from 9/11, especially with your stupid pepperoni stars. NOTE: I ate a bit too much frozen Ellio’s growing up.
2. Land Rover
WHAT?!? Below is the first Google Image result for “muscular stance”.
3. APPLE
So, it’s Titanium? WOW. Made with some Titanium? ALL Titanium? No matter FUCKING. TITANIUM. As it reads. On both sides of this billboard. If I throw it at somebody’s head, will it hurt them more severely than an iPhone 14?
4. THE LEAGUE
Dating app launched in 2015 (now owned by Match). It was founded by a woman and obviously targets women with its ads. It is not cheap and has been called “elitist” by the Wall Street Journal and Bloomberg. Go ahead, try to apply. You probably won’t be accepted. (NO, I didn’t try).
No matter. I’m only here for this obnoxious, moronic copy. GOALgasm. Really. OVULATE. GTFOOH. I think the founder is projecting with her ad campaign.
brilliant. $30 of titanium btw.