SHIT POST MONDAY (free).

Another invaluable lesson in exactly how NOT to advertise.

In recognition of “Labor” Day and the obvious lack of labour put into creating these ads, I’ll be working as little as possible critiquing them.

This is your only free post of the week, free subscribers. Tomorrow through Friday—all paid-only articles. Buy a reduced annual subscription here. Last day to do it.

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This is a hot new approach in Outdoor advertising: lazy/meaningless/terrible copy combined with shitty stock photo, or stock photo quality, visuals. Great job, everybody.

EXPEDIA

I was “made”? You know NOTHING about how I was made. See, Expedia’s tagline is “Made To Travel”. So the CW is desperately, badly trying to “integrate” the headline with the tagline. And, how bout just a nice shot of a sunset, instead of this ugly mish-mash.

Aspall Cider (UK)

Truth be told, who gives a flying fuck where you’re more at home at. You’re a bottle of liquid. And Jesus, what a dead-ass nothing photo. Three racially-diverse people.

JACK DANIELS

Sure you can puke in the parking lot, if you want/must. Just MAKE IT COUNT. And does Jack really think people are going to read all that boring-ass copy on a transit poster? Again, three racially-diverse people.

SCHWEPPES (UK)

BORN SOCIAL. Yeah-Nah, I think we’re all—including individual bottles of Schweppes—born non-social. And RE the headline: well that depends on the “stories”. Whatever story these three are “making” looks boring as piss. Slick art direction, too, making “beats” Scheppes yellow. And yes, three racially-diverse people.