McDonald's Wins Annual UK X-Mas Ad Tear-Jerk-Off

The British LOVE Christmas. They love it even more than Imperialism.

Every Fall, Brands spend big money producing lavish, complicated Holiday ads in attempts to satiate the maniacally overjoyful Brits.

Retailer John Lewis (often the winner) was again the frontrunner (more on their controversial ad next week) until last Friday when McD’s UK unleashed “Imaginary Iggy”. This :90 spot isn’t just “tugging” heartstrings, it’s ripping them out and garroting people with them. Go ahead watch it, BUT HAVE TISSUES AND A DEFIBRILLATOR READY.

Matilda’s imaginary friend is pretty boring-looking, unattractive even, isn’t he? Should’ve created better, Leo Burnett!

When she’s older, after stuffing Iggy in a closet, Matilda of course goes to a McD’s with friends and sees a young black boy apparently “feeding” his imaginary friend (Because McDonald’s is a fucking happy magical place where shit like this can happen, get it, dumb consumer?).

The track is, according to McD’s website, “a spine-tingling (what) rendition of Time After Time by singing sensation Mabel…” FYI, the song was co-written by Rob Hyman of the underappreciated Philly band The Hooters.

Is it a terrible ad? I guess not. Is it a good ad? NO. There’s your money review.

When I was a young lad, I had many imaginary friends (with benefits)—Playboy Playmates. My Dad stored his monthly issues in a closet right outside of my isolated only-child upstairs bedroom. This was kind of his nonverbal way of teaching me Sex Ed, I believe (I never asked him).