"Does Capitalism Suck" Campaign, Sucks.

Via Forbes, unsurprisingly.

You might be wondering: “But copyranter, you work in advertising, so you can’t hate capitalism”.

Well, Yes I Can. Because I’m old and I say so.

What’s a bit surprising (but not really, now, in 2023) about this campaign is that it was created by a “creative” ad agency: Goodby Silverstein & Partners.

What’s not surprising is that this campaign had to be approved by Malcolm Stevenson Forbes Jr., born with the largest silver spoon in world history in his mouth. Forbes hates poor people almost as much as he hates Barack Obama.

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Before we start, how bout engaging in some minor Capitalism and click here to buy a cheap-as-fuck $50 a year subscription. I promise to give some of it to some homeless people in my neighborhood (that’s Socialism, btw).

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So if you’re near death, homeless poverty person, just grab yourself some big ol’ CAPITALISM and “escape” it, even though CAPITALISM is most likely what caused your poverty. Splitting hairs.

Actually, about 99.99999% of businesses are harming the planet, even most of the ones supposedly halfheartedly trying to save it.

Also, Henry Ford never sat in a self-driving car. Checkmate, Capitalists. As if self-driving cars are the apex of human achievement. Marx also: never made a cat video; never stood in line for 12 hours to buy the latest iPhone; never jerked-off to photos of a Playboy Playmate; never played a game of Monopoly; never experienced a “Taco Tuesday”; etc. Sorry, just stream-of-consciousness there for a second.